Race Day Recap

Saturday was the Glow Run 5K.  As it sounds, this is a light-hearted race that takes place at night with glow bracelets, black lights, and silly costumes.  It was cool for August so I wore black tights with neon pink knee high socks, neon yellow shorts, my glow run tee-shirt and a long-sleeved pink shirt underneath.  I was glowtastic!

I signed up for this race way back in May with a group of girls including my sisters-in-law, mother-in-law, and several friends.  I was excited!

Then my training was derailed over the summer.  Still, lately I've been running with my sisters-in-law to help us stay accountable for our fitness and what a blessing that has been.  I can't tell you how many days I've not wanted to run, but because I had a "date" with my SILs, I went anyway and was so glad that I did.  Because of this, I knew that I would be able to run a 5K without too much difficulty.

Then it was race day.  I wasn't quite ready to go at the agreed upon time so we got down to the start a little late.  And by a little late, I mean the race actually started without us.  Only by a few minutes and because it was chip-timed, we were still able to run it.  Unfortunately, it didn't leave me any time to use the restroom before hand.  Let me just say to anyone who has, or ever will run a race - USE THE BATHROOM FIRST.  Running a 5K while you've "gotta go" is unpleasant to say the least.

The additional problem with missing the start was that I was behind all of the walkers.  And there were a lot.  I had expected this.  I knew there were going to be a lot of rookies who were just out to have a good time, and good for them!  But I wanted to run it, so I found myself threading and weaving between all of the walkers and strollers and crazy costumes.  They were in groups so it was difficult to pass and they took up the entire street including sidewalks so I found myself jumping up and down curbs just to try to get around people.  I thought to myself, "You are going to fall if you're not careful".  And then I did.  I bit it at mi 1.5.  My foot hit right where the sidewalk met some grass and I landed on my right knee and right hand. Some girl asked if I was okay a couple of times just to make sure, and I appreciated her concern, but I was so stinking mortified that I just picked myself up, told her I was fine and kept running.

At this point I was just miserable.  I needed a bathroom, a bandaid, and a hug.  But I just kept going.  What other choice did I have?  I got to the finish line and thought it didn't seem like it was a full 5K.  And it wasn't.  According to my phone, it was 2.71 and my time was 27.12.  I was kind of disappointed that it wasn't the full distance because I wouldn't be able to compare my times to previous races but in figuring out that it was 10 min miles, I tried to stay positive.  That's a pretty good pace for me and it had felt pretty good.  Especially considering my training has been lackluster this summer.

I found a bathroom and then went to find everyone.  As each of my friends and family completed, we all shared our own experiences on the course.  I was feeling pretty down, but everyone else was in good spirits so I tried to perk myself up.  We went out for some snacks and drinks and I started to relax.  I told myself not to take myself so seriously and just enjoy the company I was in.  By the time we headed home, I was definitely feeling better.  I am sporting a bruise and scrape on my knee but that will heal.  I am sure there are some more lessons I am supposed to learn from this experience, but I think I'm going to have to ponder it for a little while before I figure it out.

Me, Dara, Nikki (in yellow), Nicole (behind Nikki), Lara, Anne, Jen

Inspiration Part 2

I recently posted about Sarah, who inspires me in so many ways, in her determination and faith, but this post is about another person who inspires me.  Jacque.

Like Sarah, Jacque is a friend I met while attending college.  She played saxophone in the band and was a brother of Kappa Kappa Psi.  Also like Sarah, she is someone with whom I was friendly, but we didn't "hang out" a lot.  I liked her.  How could you not?  She always had a ready smile and a positive attitude, no matter the situation.  And even back then, she was a woman of faith.  I remember that she didn't drink.  She used to have Pepsi parties.  There were a few who smirked at such a thing, and even though I drank (although not until mid-sophomore year), I thought it was cool that she stuck to her beliefs.  And even though others might have judged her, she didn't judge them in return, drinking was just something she chose not to do.  I don't know why, but that always stuck with me.

Fast forward to 2011.  Also like Sarah, Jacque and I reconnected on Facebook.  I don't think we particularly conversed a lot, but occasionally "liked" or commented on each other's posts.  And then in September, came the diagnosis.  Jacque was diagnosed with breast cancer.  What?  WHAT?!?!  "But she's 33," I thought.  MY age.  How can this be?  It hit me hard.  "This is something older people get," I thought.  Both my mom and my mother-in-law had it and THANK GOD, beat it. Perhaps it was just difficult to imagine cancer striking a person who is so full of light. She has such JOY in the Lord. But cancer doesn't care.  It doesn't care if you are a drug addict or a saint.  There's no rhyme or reason, it just IS.

Fortunately, the Lord cares.  And Jacque knows it.  Like deep down in her heart, without a doubt, knows she is loved by God.  And what an amazing GIFT that is.  I would come to learn of this tremendous faith in the following months, but in the meantime, I just wanted to DO something.  But what could I do? I can't even remember the last time I saw her other than on Facebook.  We don't pick up the phone and chat regularly.  So I prayed.  And I contacted a mutual friend, Stacy, who I knew was much more in touch with Jacque, and I offered to make ribbons for us to put on our instruments at the Homecoming Parade.  I didn't want to be presumptuous. Who was I to organize something like this?  We're not BFFs.  But you know what?  I didn't care.  It seemed like the right thing to do.  Anything to lift her spirits.  I wanted her to know that she was important to us (the Bearcat family) and that we were thinking about her.  I later got a message that she had appreciated it and that's all that mattered to me.

Throughout the following months, Jacque would undergo surgery and treatment. Because she was only 33 and they found some cancer in her lymph nodes, the treatment would be fairly agressive.  Several different chemo medicines followed by radiation.  She would deal with all of these treatments while trying to continue teaching in her 4th grade classroom.  She underwent a mastectomy and lost her hair and had setbacks and developed lymphedema.  She had ups and most certainly had downs, but she fought and most importantly, she never lost faith.  Almost every post of her Caring Bridge blog would include some sort of scripture or some piece of wisdom or truth that she had come across.  Many people throw their hands up and ask God, "Why?".  They get angry and even lose their faith altogether.  I can't pretend to know what went through her mind.  Perhaps she had moments of doubt, but as far as I could see through her posts, she had nothing but unswerving faith.  She found blessings where many would see none.  And I was INSPIRED.  She used her cancer as an opportunity to show us what faith is all about.  To show us what TRUSTING THE LORD is all about and it was amazing.  In her most recent post (a couple of weeks ago), she was finishing up her radiation.  She still has to continue taking herceptin until March, so she's not done with her battle yet, but she still remains strong in her faith and her belief that God is using her for His greater purpose.  And I believe that must be the case.  Because He has used her to inspire me. To have faith. To trust. To believe.

In October, I will be running in the Susan G. Komen 5K in her (and my mom and mother in law's) honor.  Running is something that she enjoyed before her cancer and she has asked that if people have the means, to donate money or participate in a run/walk to support research and promote awareness.  I have decided to do both.  I donated money to Stacy's team in Kansas City and will be participating in my own run in Omaha in October.  For someone who has battled and fought with such courage and grace, what choice do I have but to honor this request? I'm looking forward to it.

Inspiration Part 1

Inspiration comes from all sorts of people and sometimes where you least expect it. I've been pondering this idea lately as I try to get back into running. Let me just say that I never completely left running, but there for a while it became something I dreaded. I looked for any excuse to get out of it which then lead to guilt later. Then, when I finally did run, it felt awful...probably because it had been too long between runs. It's a vicious cycle.

First of all, I wouldn't call myself a natural runner. I don't get a runner's high pretty much ever. Not the way I do with other activities such as dance. But I do feel a certain amount of satisfaction with a job completed. A sense of accomplishment when I've broken a distance barrier. Unfortunately for me, adding distance seems to be extremely difficult. When trying to follow training plans, I have a hard time adding as much distance as is scheduled in the amount of time scheduled. I've learned to be ok with that and just accept that my body takes longer.

"So why run?", you might ask. Partly because it requires no equipment, other than shoes and partly, well.... Just to prove that I can. With my very active family, I like the fact that I can just throw on my shoes and go. I don't have to spend a bunch of money on a fitness video or waste time driving to the gym. Unfortunately, I live in a climate that sometimes forces me indoors, but that's what leads me to the real reason I run....to prove that I can. I refuse to give up. Even though I'm slow (and I'm not being modest-I run about a 10:30 min mile) and sometimes I feel like I'm going to die, and sometimes I do give up in that moment, but I get back out there the next time to prove that I'm not a quitter and that I really can do it.

So last May, I ran a 10k. It was my second one and I shaved several minutes off my time. I felt great about it. This was right at the end of the school year and less than a week later, my family was off on a trip to Disney World. It was an AMAZING trip. I didn't run while I was gone, but as much as I was on my feet, it sure felt like I had! While I was there, I signed up for my first half marathon, which takes place in Sep. When I got back from my trip, I went out on my first training run. I had found a 16 week training schedule that looked much more doable for my slow-to-add-distance pace. That first run was AWFUL. It was hot and I felt terrible. But not to worry, the next one will be better, right? WRONG. It was bad again. Not only did it feel awful, but I couldn't even finish 3 miles. 3 miles! I had just completed a 10k (6.2 miles) 2 weeks before, what was the deal?!?!?!?! I began to get discouraged and started the procrastination game, which lead to the downward spiral I mentioned earlier.

Then, in July, I went to visit a friend in Long Beach, CA. I was determined to run while there. The weather was perfect. It was just me, sans kids. No excuses. I ran once in the 4 mornings I was there. Not exactly the plan, but the one run I completed felt great! I came home determined to get back to it. If it meant running on the treadmill in the a/c, so be it.

So if you're still reading this, you're probably wondering where the inspiration part plays in. Well here goes. I have a friend named Sarah. Sarah was a classmate in college. We had classes together because we were both music ed majors at a D2 school. We got along just fine and were friendly, but she was a vocalist, while I was an instrumentalist. She was in SAI, while I was in KKPsi. I guess you could say that while we didn't travel in the same circles, our paths crossed quite a bit and it was always amicable enough. Well fast forward to 2008 when I joined Facebook. Somewhere in that first year, Sarah and I became Facebook friends. I started noticing that I often agreed with her posts and various articles. She posts a lot of comments, blog posts, and articles related to education, and I tended to agree with those too. She often posts scripture, and it always seems to be the right verse at the right time, even though we're separated by 1500 miles. And somewhere along the line, she started training for the Ironman. Yep. The real deal. Wait....Sarah was a runner? I didn't remember her running in college. I remember her having a laCrosse sticker on her car, but running? Swimming? Biking? Hmmm. Perhaps I missed that. In any case, I enjoyed following her posts regarding training and when the big day came, I enjoyed the blog post that followed with the recap. I was so proud of her. I still am. In the years since, she has had her ups and downs with training and injuries, but she still cheers me on. And I am happy when I am able to do the same for her. What makes her my inspiration?  The fact that she is human like me.  She struggles with many of the same issues I do and yet she keeps going.  She doesn't give up. I hope that before too much longer, our paths will cross again because I think we have so much more in common this time around.

So about that half marathon. My training plan is completely de-railed. I don't see how I'll be able to run 13.1. I have a couple of options: 1. I continue with the half, knowing that I will have to walk some of it (I always make it my goal to run the entire race) or 2. I can switch it to a 10k, meaning I won't fulfill my half goal, but I may feel better about myself because I'll be able to run the whole thing. I've decided to keep running for now and see how I'm feeling as race day gets closer. I'm disappointed that I've put myself in this position, but I'm trying not to focus on what I can't change and just keep moving forward.  Notice quitting was not an option.  I'll be out there on Sep 23, one way or another, and I know Sarah will be cheering me on.